Wednesday, February 20, 2013

I have enough. Part II.

I had an incredible revelation at Cracker Barrel last week before boarding a plane back home...

For weeks and weeks I have not been choosing to consistently feed myself in a nourishing way. To be clear... my philosophy as it is for all things health, is that we are each unique in our needs. Hence, what is nutritionally appropriate for you, is not necessarily going to nourish me, and so on.

By now, I am feeling bloated, have off and on acid reflux, a lovely rash on my face, some headache, and I am fatigued and foggy.

In the midst of all this I start to notice that as I sit down for each meal, I'm in argument with myself about what to order: what is best, what tastes good, what's everyone else having, how will I feel it I eat it - I'm quite cerebrally busy. I am also not peaceful - per the symtoms noted above. I am in opposition with myself about all of this.

I check-in with my body - it always does tell me - and I can choose to listen or not. When I think about eating X what do I notice in my body. Is there a cringe or pain? Do I crinkle my face? Do I sit up straighter - breathing more easily?

Finally, I notice that there is some sense in my middle/low abdomen of a vibration. I also am aware that my eyes feel twitchy and my thoughts about the aforementioned are moving with impressive rapidity. I realize that I have some fear about my food. Like, if I don't eat this deliciousness right now I may NEVER get to have it again! As if the pancakes, muffins, ice-cream and fried chicken are actually going somewhere never to be seen or heard from ever ever again!

Thank goodness for the awareness of my fear about the world's endless supply of french toast and fudge running completely dry, or I might not have come to what happens next...

I'm pulling up into the parking lot at said restaurant, and my chest is relaxed, there is no vibration in my belly. I'm comfortable and breathing with ease. I've realized...

I have enough. I have enough opportunities to eat well, or not too. There will always be biscuits and butter. I can either have them, or not, and they will still be there tomorrow. I can take care of myself, eat well and have hopefully many many tomorrows.

With that, I powerfully choose my pancake breakfast, hold the eggs (I don't need the headache I get when I eat them). I peacefully and happily enjoy my meal with my family and board a plane just 90 minutes later. No bloating, no heartburn, no discomfort.








2 comments:

  1. Exactly! The only way I've been able to eat moderately is to remind myself that I can have it again tomorrow if I want. And then sometimes I do! I've learned recently that if cutting back now means I can have my favorite foods longer and later in my life then it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. Thank you for putting my thoughts down so precisely!

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  2. Thanks, yogitastic.com :-) Sam, you are amazing!

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